写个这几天看的三篇同人的剧情简介吐槽，混……混个更
我很少看同人啊，这几篇都是旧文，我入坑晚看的少，好处就是，对我来说都是新文！
就……就随便贴上我当时边看边跟 @柳达是溜达 的吐槽吧
https://m.fanfiction.net/s/10342105/1/
The Triumph of Darth Plagueis
长篇，普老师把ppt反杀而cheng di的文，坑
用词和语言十分流水账，写的一般吧但是挺狗血好玩叫我忍不住熬夜看了好多，简直。
Tremella 02:30:30
妈的我刚又发现一篇普老师把ppt反杀了的文
巨长，41章，然后坑了
开头就普老师把ppt弄死了
然后普老师开始找备胎 。你猜猜备胎是谁
溜达 02:33:39
不会是杜库吧
Tremella 02:34:21
The first step was fully seducing Count Dooku to the Dark Side. A task Plagueis suspected would be far easier now that Dooku’s beloved former apprentice Qui-Gon was no more.
你猜对了就是他。
然后他还整了个克隆ppt
溜达 02:34:25
我就说普老师有一颗心是给他的（？
Tremella 02:36:14
妈的这个克隆ppt身体不好使 ，过一阵就病了
所以就还是普老师掌权 。开始忽悠邱森万
溜达 02:37:10
普老师真是
三心二意呀
Tremella 02:39:19
太好笑了这段On a personal note Damask befriend the former human slave, current Jedi padawan, Anakin Skywalker. At first the old Munn’s transpirator mask had frightened the boy. Recognizing the impediment to their potential relationship Damask had undergone cutting edge, cloning based, facial reconstruction surgery on Kamino late in his first year as Co-Supreme Chancellor. Thanks in part to some help from the Dark Side of the Force, following the procedure Damask looked like his old self again. Crediting the importance of aesthetic appeal in politics for his decision to repair his damaged face while noting the health risk which had been involved, Damask was more popular with the masses than ever before. Most importantly during the following nine years he became a wise, jovial, grandfatherly figure to Anakin. Slowly, yet persistently, Damask planted the seeds of darkness within the boy. Seeds which would one day bring a great harvest.
操不，你不戴呼吸面具也不好看！
缪恩审美和人类审美是不可兼容的！
溜达 02:39:49
脸大如门 ，是硬伤
Tremella 02:39:53
安纳金这个颜狗不会看上你的！
呀他还把馍馍捡回来了 ，还有点可爱
溜达 02:41:18
收养的孩子 ，和安纳金亲儿子
Tremella 02:42:38
哈哈哈妈的他随便把克隆ppt搞了个公开暗杀弄死了
然后普老师愉快使唤杜库和馍
卧槽欧比旺是在调查克隆ppt暗杀时找到了克隆军，就和去卡密诺那段一样
这个普老师，非常热心给安纳金和帕德美牵线搭桥 ，笑死我了一个老娘舅
Coruscant – Upscale Restaurant
Supreme Chancellor of the Republic Hego Damask was having supper with Jedi Padawan Anakin Skywalker and Senator Padme Amidala in one of the finniest eateries on the galactic capital. It had been three standard solar days since the political discussion between Damask and Amidala had taken place at the very same booth where the party was now seated. Anakin was shyly stealing glances at the Senator while trying hard not to blush. If Padme noticed his interest she gave no outward indications. Padme for her part was more interested in chatting with the Supreme Chancellor than flirting with a young Jedi, which she was vaguely aware was forbidden anyhow.
“Thank you for inviting me to dine with you this evening Supreme Chancellor Damask” Padme said.
“Please child no need to stand on ceremony, call me Hego” Damask said with a disarming smile, glancing at Anakin. “All my friends do.”
请他俩吃饭
溜达 02:50:53
这就是个普老师重生逆袭总裁爽文哈哈哈哈哈
Tremella 02:51:08
对所以我忍不住看了下去
卧槽这篇是，安纳金妈妈要死时候普老师跑过去（以普老师而不是达马斯克的身份）说，你想不想叫你妈妈活？想的话去把沙人全杀了，我可以用他们的纤原体救活你妈（并演示了一下）
普老师干脆弃疗，跑腿的不嫌多，文姐格里夫斯都愉快收徒了
二人法则个屁！
溜达 03:17:41
多p法则（gun
Tremella 03:23:57
妈的安纳金激情夸赞普老师，太好笑了
Anakin felt Padme’s body tense against him. “Ani surely you don’t believe Supreme Chancellor Damask is right, do you?” Padme asked breaking their embrace.
“Of course I do. The Supreme Chancellor is a great being” Anakin said defending his mentor. “If it wasn’t for his tough policies even more worlds would have joined the CIS by now. Damask is a hero.”
“I know Damask is your unofficial mentor, and a good friend, still I can’t believe what I’m hearing. Anakin the Supreme Chancellor is stoking the fires of conflict. Do you know that he refuses to negotiate with the Separatists in any way, shape or form?”
溜达 03:24:26
像极了爱情的模样
Tremella 01:13:04
我继续看了看那个文。那普老师指示杜库搞了个阴谋陷害了贝尔奥加纳……然后分离势力说要么加入我们要么你就被共和国审判。
然后巴里斯不知道怎么被整死了，然后阿索卡就对参议院十分愤恨，在那儿骂帕德美……
这个阿索卡跟普老师混得还挺熟。太恶心啦！
阿索卡在那儿吃帕德美的醋，因为师父天天跟屁虫帕德美，不理她
然后在这儿跟普老师抱怨。这什么迷惑的知心祖父
然后普老师这厮干脆告诉她安纳金帕德美已经好上了
卧槽在一次跟格里夫斯打架时安纳金中了吐真剂，然后对梅斯温度把杀沙人，跟帕德美结婚，都说了
然后温度要把他逮起来正法。阿索卡就急了！！跟安纳金一激动就把温度捅死了！！
于是他俩假装是，格里夫斯杀的
哦这里欧比旺是和希瑞cp了，所以也知道安纳金帕德美，也没辙
这个阿索卡太完蛋了，简直是个西斯好苗子
这里绝地委员会更沙雕！那段电影里it is unfair是安纳金阿索卡一起去的，然后俩人全被骂，然后就回骂委员会。委员会大怒，叫阿索卡换师父，安纳金停职。
然后俩人愤怒地就跑去找普老师了，哈哈哈哈哈
然后普老师向他们揭露了身份！
普老师：要不要当西斯？阿索卡：我要我要我要！
安纳金犹豫了一下，然后问，我当西斯能救我老婆吗
普老师：没问题啊
然后把帕德美带过来，给她解释。帕德美：我不要！你们都是坏人！就跑了
安纳金让阿索卡追去
帕德美直接跑去绝地那儿去举报普老师是西斯！不过没提安纳金阿索卡的事
卧槽这阿索卡 。听到帕德美举报，就告诉安纳金她已经背叛他了，然后，就说师父我爱你你别要她了跟我好吧
然后他俩就亲上了
然后喜闻乐见的普老师弄死来打他的绝地们，哈哈哈哈
然后愉快地收了安纳金阿索卡为徒弟，哈哈哈哈哈哈
妈的这个安纳金，直接去逮帕德美让她剖腹产
然后普老师愉快66，安纳金愉快杀youngling
不过还有一件事，是让安纳金阿索卡，跟杜库文翠丝打一仗，看哪俩人牛逼，才能留下来
结果显而易见嘛
然后安纳金阿索卡和欧比旺西瑞在一个不是穆斯塔法的星球打了一架，这回阿索卡断了一条胳膊一条腿，虽然没有岩浆，但是特么的船炸了，！就不能不烧了嘛？？？！
于是之后就喜闻乐见的，普老师捡烤鸡（两只），装壳
欧比旺西瑞尤达，和卢克莉亚都去了塔图因
咦这里头馍馍不知道啥时候死掉了，没注意
之后就，普老师愉快cheng di
溜达 08:19:59
？？？好一个西斯大乱炖
我关心的是杜库他们不会死了吧！
Tremella 10:37:17
死了啊！
杜库又一次，刚见到新帝国的曙光，就中道崩殂了
我之后就没仔细看，大概就是皇帝普老师派遣维达和阿索卡俩人到处打叛军。然而俩人也内心暗怀鬼胎（因为普老师明明可以给他们更好的“身体”，却为了惩罚他们叫他们半人半机器，之类的，就很不服）。而叛军听说是和奇斯舰队联军了，感觉还有点意思会，但是坑了。
https://m.fanfiction.net/s/8388456/1/
The Cradle Will Fall
中篇，普老师ppt早早地就抢来安纳金养着的文，坑
Tremella 08:09:20
是普老师ppt在安纳金一被怀上就感知到了，跑去塔图因把施密抢走 ，从安纳金生下来就开始养着的事
普老师抓着ppt跑去塔图因“找我儿子去！”ppt一脸懵逼：卧槽师父啥时候又背着我整出了个儿子？？？
那里头馍馍可惨，就仿佛重男轻女家庭，在终于获得一个儿子之后，对大姐百般虐待似的
不过也坑了。作者说：我结婚去了！
普老师ppt去拐了施密，让她生了孩子以后，普老师跟ppt说：你叫那孩子认你为父亲。ppt说：为啥你不去？普老师：……我当他爹的话，他照镜子不会迷惑吗？？
然后ppt就不得不喜当爹了
普老师还叫ppt和施密共处几天培养感情（这破师父啥事都管，简直烦死了
溜达 08:19:40
他俩长的也不像喂！
不过好歹是个人
Tremella 08:19:48
对。普老师还叫他表现出爱安纳金。当然意思是为了叫他们产生bond，以备日后黑化时候用。
ppt很迷惑：这个我做不到啊！
然后就，养孩子去了。ppt第一件事就是把新儿子丢给了可怜大姐馍馍
安纳金吃东西噎着了打嗝。保育机器人说这也没啥办法，就过过自己就好了，或者你吓唬他一下。馍馍：草吓唬人这事我在行，我吓唬吓唬
然后馍馍肯定会，嫉妒啊，但也没办法
然后有天馍馍就不乐意，说我天天给你养孩子，也不好好西斯训练了，您有啥正经任务我能做
ppt一看这倒霉孩子居然嫉妒起来了，好烦人！
啊对他确实对安纳金还挺好的，抱着哄，亲一口啥的（2岁）
然后他把馍馍扔到一个克雷特龙那儿叫他打龙
然后馍身受重伤（断腿啥的）普老师也来看，说，给他装个假腿吧，要么装个蜘蛛腿，多好玩
然后安纳金在三岁的时候又要被送到施密那里
因为普老师迷惑的计划
要让他对“父”和母都产生附件
ppt把安纳金带给了施密，然后就，坑了，草
感觉这个设定还挺有意思的，坑了有点可惜。
并且ppt没白，就还是非常creepy的变态感，还挺好的。
https://m.fanfiction.net/s/12008797/1/
Infinite Possibilities
前教主的文。是这里的前两章，短篇，完结。后几章就是ppt没当普老师徒弟然后飙车迎娶施密走向人生巅峰的那个故事，http://isaakfvkampfer.lofter.com/post/1cd1fea1_d470585 isaakfvkampfer太太写过介绍
Tremella 16:30:47
哈哈哈哈哈哈哈操，发现前教主也写过一篇ppt养馍和安纳金的。简直是鸡飞馍跳，笑死了
普老师简直就是丧偶式育儿典型，全都扔给ppt干
To his eternal shame, Sidious had once visited a self-help Holonet site for young single fathers shortly after Plagueis had first dumped the human baby into his arms. Make it a game, they had said. He looked down at the spoon and bowl, bit his lip hard to enough to make it bleed, and leaned forward for a new attempt. “Here comes the Starfighter. Zip. Zip.” Obviously not his best performance, but Anakin opened his mouth and giggled, and he took the chance to slide the paste inside.
Anakin scowled at him, betrayed, and the Force trembled with a tiny wave of anger.
“Good,” Sidious smirked down at him. “Very good. Use your aggressive feelings, boy.”
哈哈哈哈哈哈哈
溜达 20:43:41
草，被迫慈祥！
Tremella 20:54:58
这个鸡飞馍跳的就两章
这个结局是：一家三口去把普老师给弄死了。因为普老师叫安纳金和馍馍俩人对打，强者存活。而俩人都不乐意。于是孤儿寡母的就把家暴丈夫给杀了（？
附赠溜达今天搞出来的沙雕东西，大概能当这俩同人的封面了。
